Korea Women's Hot Line

Korea Women’s Hotline 28^th Anniversary Event

The Great Participation “A Day of Hope”

Fundraising Event to Benefit Survivors of Domestic & Sexual Violence

When:     June 11, 2011

             1:00 p.m.-11:00 p.m.

Where:     Waltz Hof Restaurant (왈츠호프레스토랑)

Contact:   02-3156-5400

Directions

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-Take Line 2 to Euljiro 1(il)-ga Station (Exit 2). Continue straight out of the exit. After you pass the Dong-a Building (동아빌딩), take the first left (down the alleyway before you reach the Daewoo Joseon Seonhaeyang Building (대우조선선행빌딩)).  Walt’s Hof Restaurant will be on your left on the second floor.

Address and Phone

Waltz Hof Restaurant, 2^nd Floor, Da-dong Building, 92 Da-dong, Jung-gu, Seoul

서울특별시 중구 다동 92 다동빌딩 2층 왈츠호프레스토랑

Ph.: 02-755-8561

Tickets

Tickets for the event can be purchased at the door. 

All proceeds from the event benefit survivors of domestic violence.

To make a donation, please use the name/account number below.

Bank: Hana Bank (하나은행)

Account Name: Korea Women’s Hotline (한국여성의전화)

Account Number: 388-810010-08604

Volunteers crossing borders Ingrid Sikorcin

I am a native of Toronto, Canada and have been living in Daejeon for about 7 years.  I am an English instructor at Joongbu University and when I'm not working I like to spend my time in Korea's beautiful mountains.

2. How did you plan "party for a purpose" and why did you decide to do make Korea Women’s Hot Line the beneficiary? Please tell us more about this event.

While living in Toronto I would attend the December 6th Memorial to remember the 14 women killed at a Montreal university in 1989, as well as many other women who were victims of violence.  A few years ago I was thinking about this event and decided to do something in Daejeon to help woman living with or trying to leave violent relationships.  I had heard about 'Night of 1000 Dinners', a fundraiser for a landmine NGO which asks people to host dinners for their friends who in turn bring a donation instead of flowers.   I thought I could do something similar but instead of a dinner party I could host a wine party, something my girlfriends and I used to do regularly in Daejeon.  So, I made some appetizers and asked my guests to bring a bottle of wine to share and a donation to Korea Women's Hot Line.  I don't remember exactly how I first heard about KWHL but I wanted to donate to an organization that helped women when no one else would.  Two years ago I thought other people might be interested in hosting their own wine party so I started to spread the idea around Korea via the internet.   Parties of all kinds - soups, birthdays, Christmas, board games, wine – have all been held in the month of December all over Korea to support the work of KWHL.  This year will be the 4th year for Party for a Purpose.

3. Do you have any interest in Women's Rights? If so, why is it important?

Women's rights are human rights and therefore should be important to everyone.  A community is not healthy and prosperous unless everyone is safe from violence and discrimination.  Violence against women is unfortunately a fact of life in so many communities, including my own.  If I want to live in a just and peaceful world then I have to help women any way I can.  If we don't help each other then who will?

4. How do you feel about women's rights in Korea?

A few years ago I was walking home and came across a man choking a woman in his car.  I tried to get him to stop but he wouldn't.  I tried to get people who were walking by to help but they just stared and kept walking.  The fact that no one was willing to help was just as disturbing as what this woman was going through.  I understand that Korean culture values privacy, especially when it comes to family matters, but in my heart, valuing the life of an individual is more important than upholding social customs.  The good thing about our ideas is that they are not static, they can change.  As more and more people start talking about issues affecting women in Korea, ideas of what is right and wrong will change.  As ideas change, so will actions.

The woman didn't leave when she had the chance and it's not for me to judge her or her decisions.  Maybe she wasn't emotionally ready or didn't have the money to leave or perhaps it wasn't safe for her to go.  KWHL is a part of the solution to all of these barriers - the counselors provide emotional support; the shelter provides a safe place to stay; its advocacy is creating a more equitable Korean society for everyone, from ideas, to action.

5. Please say something to Korea Women's Hot Line members and Foreigners who live in Korea and share an interest in Women’s Rights.

Violence against women is a global problem, so it doesn't matter if we don't speak the same language, if we don't have to live by the same cultural rules, if we can look away or leave if we don't like it - we can still come together and help one another. Talking about violence against women, bringing it out into the open and challenging each other to not accept it as 'a private matter' is the first step.  Supporting organizations like KWHL is another.  If we pool our energy and resources together, we can make a difference.  I couldn't help the woman being assaulted by her partner that day, but perhaps the money I raise at a wine party will enable KWHL to train its volunteer counselors, to pay for the heating bills at their shelter, or to lobby the government to update its laws so that when she needs to she can call someone for support, when she's ready she can take her children to a safe place, and while doing all of this know that the law will protect her. 

6. We will organize a group "Volunteers crossing borders". We want to be able to communicate with Foreigners living in Korea. It is our expectation; we can do many things like translation, fundraising events or campaigns. What do you think of this idea and will you join us?

Over the years I have met many foreigners who have expressed an interest in volunteering in Korea but they don't know where to go or what to do.  There are some opportunities in Seoul but for foreigners living in smaller cities or in the countryside there aren't very many chances to become involved.  Volunteers Crossing Borders is a great idea, especially if it empowers people to get involved and help the communities in which they live, no matter how small.  This is actually one of the reasons why I was so interested in working with Korea Women's Hot Line - while many non-profit organizations service a local community, KWHL has counseling centers all across Korea.  So no matter where we live, if we get involved we are helping a neighbor, a co-worker, or friend.   

I would be more than happy to help Korea Women's Hot Line any way I can. 

* if you want to know about <party for purpose>, you can visit the

http://www.facebook.com/#!/group.php?gi ··· v%3Dwall //

* Inquire : KWHL(82-2-3156-5400)

Stop the punishment of Women who have abortions.

The Future Planning Committee stated that focusing on the issue of abortion could provide a potential solution for Korea’s low birthrate. As a result, the government's stance on abortion was expressed by the Ministry of Health’s rigid enforcement to regulate all abortions in 2010. Consequently, the Prolife Council, which includes a number of obstetricians, has accused select hospitals of undergoing abortion procedures. These events have made abortion more of a hot issue in Korean society.

There are two different perspectives to be taken into consideration: one believing that a fetus is a human being and those who value it lightly should be punished; while the other argues that it Politicians are holding pregnant women hostages and taking away their right to choose. The most pressing issue here is the practical problems that women with unwanted pregnancies face. The surgery fee of abortions has increased, and the women having the abortions, as well as the doctors performing the abortions are punished by law.

Korean Women's Hot Line participated in the 'Network for securing Women's Rights at pregnancy and childbirth,' as a member. We have actively voiced our opinions, participated in various meetings and discussions to give a voice to the abortion issue from a women's perspective. We created a website called 'Talking about abortion', where related counsels and opinions can be expressed, in order to give practical help to the women facing difficulties.  Through this process, the need for change is present. Discussions have been generated and reforms have begun within the Mother & Child Health Law and Criminal law codes.

There will be more debates about the abortion issue in 2011, but we will try our best to encourage discussions that looks at the situation from all sides.

Journal of activities related to abortion

2009/11/26 [Statement] Withdraw the abortion prevention policy that denies the women's right of reproduction!

2010/2/3 [Statement] Immediately stop the anti-human rights accusation of abortion that threatens women's safety and guarantees the women's right to abortion!

2010/3/5 Commemorating 3.8. International Women's day, "Announcement of women's right to choice on pregnancy, childbirth and their bodies.

2010/3/29 Opening of 'Talking about abortions' site: www.hotline.or.kr/respect

2010/4/7 [Statement] Criminalizing abortion is not the solution.

2010/6/7 [Comment] Reasons for raising objection to the social consultative group's intention to preventing artificial abortion.

2010/6/22 [Statement] Sexual assault said to "help abortion" has been responsible for 'criminalizing abortion'!

2010/8/31 Announcement request for a network, for Women's Rights to decide on pregnancy and childbirth.

2010/10/14 [Statement] strongly condemns the Suwon office and the Ansan branch office which persecuted women getting abortions!

Prevention of Violence against Women’s actions, is it the best way?

Despite the law, domestic violence, sexual assault, and prostitution still occur.

Orthodox treatment for the offender- is opening the offender's personal information to eradicate violence against women the best way?

In order to change the patriarchal perception of people, what should we put into practice?

Questions, again and again discovers practical behaviors.

Korea Women's Hotline, aims to enforce the law specifically and to increase the responsibility of the local governments to start exercising an order that will enact Seoul Women's Violence Prevention and Victim Protection Act.

Of course, other municipalities already have programs related to violence against women. However there is nothing that includes children, surveys, preventive education, or campaigns. Ordinance is a sort of titular four, despite the differences and the obligation of the local government, though it stated the differences of 'Violence against Children, and Violence against Women, and its roles and directions. 

Society prepared model of ordinance that is focused on regulation specific responsibilities of local governments, establishments and the operation of the Committee against violence against women, prevention of violence against women, and victim protection measures and the promotion of the establishment, survey of reality of violence against women, and preventive information campaign. But it was not easy model to put into action.

In order to be enacted, the Ordinance had to include children and be must be changed as 'regional solidarity clause performing perfunctory meeting once or twice a year  instead of  the Committee of violence against women and provisions of the city of Seoul survey on violence against women.

The situation here continues to crash, but we'll do our best to create a' proper Ordinance, that includes everything', not 'neither one nor the other Ordinance'.

2009. 5. 7 Seoul council meeting - passed model of ordinances.

2009. 5. 9 Signatures on petitions urging enactment - 9010 people.

2009. 11. 6 Discussion with Lee Guem-ran about submitted motion.

2009. 11. 9 Seoul city council ordinance submitted ordinance - as Unattended / being changed by 8th council, automatically discarded.

2009. 11. 16 Seoul Women's violence prevention experts' review.

2009. 11. 19 city ordinances related to prevention of violence against women interviewed, Seoul Women's Policy Officer.

2010. 10. 13 National Ordinance Survey

2010. 10. 25 Seoul members of women legislative body meeting.

2010. 11. 12 Review of Seoul Women's Violence Prevention Ordinance. 

2010. 11. 25 Seoul Women's Initiative for Violence Prevention Act Senator Park yang suk‘s Discussion.

2011. 2. 11 Receiving opinions about key issues.

2011. 2. 23 Sending position paper about key issues and promoting SNS.

2011. 3. 8 Seoul Women's Policy Officer Discussion.

Lack of concern and the silencing of abuse.

A man who always abused me:

During her 17 years of marriage, Seon-yeong (false name) who has worked as a nurse, also took care of her family-she also visited the women’s counseling office. She couldn't endure her husband’s verbal abuse. She diligently came and went in between her trips to the hospital and home. Although she did her best for her child and her husband, he was still verbally abusive to her, often cursing at her. She decided that enduring wasn’t the answer.

She felt nervous during her counseling, and had littler regard for herself and her work. She couldn’t concentrate on issues and had difficulty making forming judgments. Although her husband did not beat her up, he was still very abusive towards her.

There is a saying, “kill wife twice, other people live after being beaten up, why can't you live after hearing swear word?"

Emotional abuse is a big problem, just like physical abuse, and people and increasingly becoming aware of this. Case studies now show that emotional abuse is just as serious physical abuse. According to 'Hamby&Sugaman (1999), mental abuse has more of a negative effect on a person, more so that physical abuse. Straus&Sweet (1992) also reported that verbally attacking someone is the same as physically attacking someone.

In 2007, the Ministry of Gender Equality and Family implemented a domestic violence research on the conditions faced by abused women, and found that the men lacked compassion, refused to provide financial support and refused to take the women to the hospital.

However, even though people recognized emotional abuse as serious, the real symbol of victimization has always been 'a black eye, or a broken rib.’ But, opinions like Hamby&Sugaman (1999) showed that long-term continued emotional abuse was more harmful than physical abuse. 

The manger at a domestic abuse victim shelter appealed to the law that industrial park does not support a divorce suit to women who were not physically abused. A woman came to the shelter; because she couldn’t her endure husband's emotional abuse. She decided to file for a divorce, but when she applied for free legal aid counseling, she heard that same saying, "The other people live after being beaten up, can't you live hearing the swear word?".

According to the grounds for the law abou Domestic violenc, verbal abuse is also considered domestic abuse, so it is possible to have free legal aid counseling

Of course, she was also a target of the free legal aid counseling. But you could see the her example which shows the prejudice executor ignores the victim’s pain.

Physical violence includes being ignored and forced sexual relationships.

A woman complained of the way her husband constantly bothered her, though she didn’t complain about being physically abused.

A husband can bother a wife in a variety of ways, by ignoring her, and not helping with the children and household chores. Husbands sometimes charge the wife of having an affair, and also isolate the wife from her family. He also demands sex.

If the wife does not work, the husband uses that issue as a way to control his wife.

Jihyeon who takes care of her home often hears her husband say to their children, "your mother is your stepmother.” The initial reason was because she had given her rice wrapped in laver. At that time, her child was late for school. She can't understand why he husband made that comment. When she complained about it, his response was, "talk high and mightily".

Jeong-eun also had trauma because of her husband's indirect abuse. In a middle of a fight her husband spit at her, will never forget the shame, and humiliation that she felt. After that situation, of course any sexual relationship with her husband became difficult for her.

Wives who complain of abuse by a husband didn't say "My husband heat me like this, they said their husbands killed them everyday.” The cumulative effects made wives die inside.

The wife’s confidence and self esteem is low of wife is so low, she is isolated from her neighborhood and family, she becomes similar to an outcast.

The most difficult thing a woman experience is living as a victim with her attacker. If they are strangers then ignorance and indifference is not a problem, but a couple who has a familiar relationship, continuing ignorance is enough to damage one’s dignity.

“Wait until you are beaten up"...  the current situation of Korean Wives.

Physical abuse is a serious problem, if a woman is threatened once, she will live in fear, that one time will affect the woman emotionally for a long time.

The problem with society is that it only concentrates on physical abuse; everything else is seen as trivial.

December 10^th last year, a woman called the police station and stated that her boy friend sent her a threatening message, so she couldn’t go home. The police said to her "if he kidnaps you or threatens you with knife, come at that time".  

Ignorance, Indifference, Bothering, Cursing and Threats lack physical evidence, but holds an emotional scare a long time afterwards. 

It may not be important to other people, but for couples, especially the wife, the abuse goes on for a long time even after a divorce. We need to get raid of the prejudice that only focuses on physical abuse as a form of abuse and ignoring the other issues.

Institute of Feminist Consultation Finally Established!

On October 26^th, 2010, the Institute of Feminist Consultation was founded. The Institute of Feminist Consultation was founded on the grounds that we had built with great effort and dedication to the feminist movement. From 1983, the year when Korean Women's Hot Line was launched, we began providing feminist counseling service, it was our first step. The fruit of 27 years of hard work and preparation, opening the Institute of Feminist Consultation means the world to us.

In 2010, during the preparatory period, the Institute of Feminist Consultation arrangement committee implemented various programs through Group Super Vision. There were 6 supervisors and 12 supervisees who analyzed violence within the family and sexual abuse cases using the feminist consultation theory. A well-designed training was course was established, for people wanting to learn how to adjust the feminist consultation theory in practice. Participants, who were evaluated, commented that the course gave them a chance to look at themselves as a feminist counselor. 

The presentation studies were helpful re-training members and counselors by dealing with a wide range of subjects such as 'Men and Women; different Ideas about Divorce,' and the 'Turning Point of Victims of family abuse.' The seminar gave us a good chance to build up a network with other organizations and institutes. With the event, activists who belonged to our branches or other organizations took the first step as a feminist counselor. We were very happy to announce that one of the trainees became a supervisor after accomplishing all the steps from the Supervisor's Role to Supervision. She took the Feminist Consultation Expert training course held from 2005 to 2007.

In preparation for this institute, we revamped the organization structure and entrusted experts on related subjects. Staff members were assigned and our office, equipped, the Feminist Consultation program was ready.

In 2011, the Institute of Feminist Consultation will focus on developing a valuable and practical feminist consultation program. In order to widen the contact point with field activists supporting the Woman's Rights movement, the Institute of Feminist Consultation plans to publish a 'feminist consultation supervision' guide book. We sincerely hope to meet other members, branch activists, and you.

1/2010~12 periodical meeting of the arrangement committee for the Institute of Feminist Consultation.

1/2010~6 Feminist Consultation Group Supervision.

2/2/2010 Study Presentation: "Today's family: analysis of marriage and divorce."

20/4/2010 Study Presentation: "Turning Point between victimization and readiness."

12/6/2010 Supervisor's Role: Supervision.

26/7/2010 Study Presentation: "Philosophy Consultation and the Feminist Consultation."

12/6/2010 Supervisor's Role: Supervision.

28/10/2010~ 30 Introductory Course to become a Feminist Consultation Expert.

7/12/2010 3rd Open Supervision for the Feminist Consultation.

How to Handle Dating Violence

Korea Sexual Violence Relief Center has opened ‘Dating Lecture,’ in order to eradicate sexual violence during dates, and also has selected "The Dating Violence Assailants' Shameless Excuse Awards."

Dating Lecture was a time that women could reflect on their own dating and sexual relationships from a feministic point of view. The lecture, "We Have to Study Even for Love," opened the second time, since it first opened in 2009 - at that time; it was specifically geared towards women in their 20’s. At the session, there was an in-depth discussion about the social structure related to dating from a feministic point of view and imagining further relationships about heterosexual love, sex, marriage and love. It was decided that similar projects should be created with Education institutions and other organizations. For those reasons, Korea Sexual Violence Relief Center began to strengthen their instructors who have control hosting those kinds of programs.

In 2010, Korea Sexual Violence Relief Center introduced a lecture about sex and dating, "Experiences, Blessing Words, Serious & Silly Talks," for women in their 40’s and 50’s. There was an interesting episode, during a lecture, an audience member mentioned that she found condoms in her son's room, who's a high school student [In Korea, it's not common with teenagers having sex]. She said she had no idea to handle this problem, then another audience commented, "Take a note to your son like this: It's your mommy and I'm borrowing your condom!" That comment made everyone laugh. The audience all have their own hard and unfair experiences as married women in common, so they were able to become friends quite easily. But on the other hand, there were problems where they were shy to talk about their sexualities and sexual experiences. It left us, the Korea Sexual Violence Relief Center, with a task that we had to worry about women's diverse sexual practice and sexuality act as a role model and discussion maker.

At "The Dating Violence Assailants' Shameless Excuse Awards," there was an introduction of some new diverse words. The lecture planned to make fun of those words, so that the victims wouldn't be afraid of their attackers anymore. Statistics show that almost 70 percent of stalkers originate from dating. So we prioritized the assailant's words like 'shabby, pathetic and pitiful.' But we reached a limit and couldn’t explain their miserable behaviors in words: You could visit our website, www.sogoodbye.org, and see the details about this lecture.

**"We Have to Study Even for Love" for the women in 20s**

-First Session

Love: Do it as in the old pattern or new way (on May 16th, 2010)

-Second Session

Sex: Do it by yourself or together (on May 11th, 2010)

-Third Session

Friendly but Fatal (on May 13th, 2010)

-Fourth Session

Marriage: Do it or don't do it (on May 18th, 2010)

-Fifth Session

Unknowledgeable or fearful (on May 20th, 2010)

-Sixth Session

Body: reward or resource (on May 25th, 2010)

-Seventh Session

Break Up: Do it by yourself or together (on May 27th, 2010)

**"Experiences, Blessing Words, Serious & Silly Talks" for the women ages 40’s-50’s**

-First Session

Experiences: Living as women in 40s and 50s (on November 30th, 2010)

-Second Session

Serious Talks: As you know, you could be funny and free (on December 2nd, 2010)

-Third Session

Silly Talks: Conduct conversations about our bodies that is sex friendly (on December 7th, 2010)

Application for the I-phone 『DATE UP DATE』

The statistics at the Korea Women’s Hotline from 2007-2009, 30.2% or 412 of the total sexual abuse counseling was that of date violence. Women in their 20’s accounted for 60%-73.6% of the victims.

These women experience many different kinds of abuse, (verbal-abuse, threat, surveillance, control, attack, injury, sexual violence, confinement, extortion, kidnap, attempted murder etc.) which is unlikely bare evidence, their attacked went unpunished. We also found that 'Date violence' and 'Wife violence' have a strong correlation.  The survey results from Swim-Teo (shelter)'s users in 2007, showed that 23.5% of the victims of family violence had experienced physical abuse prior to marriage.

Most victims were worried about their relationship with the attacker, so they end did not pursue persecution. But as the time passed, they recognize that they can’t put a stop to the abuse all alone. Meanwhile, the attacker doesn’t seem to realize that their behavior is illegal, and that their wives are victims. This is one of the reasons of the continued violence between men and women. 

We, at the Korean Women's Hotline, decided to create an application 『DATE UP DATE』in order to prevent date violence from occurring, while promoting a healthy and equal dating relationship.

『DATE UP DATE』features the step-by-step date courses for women in their 20’s and 30’s, who are interested in dating - date preparation, from the beginning, to the end, (breaking up or not). Women will have access to useful information such as opinions about the date, date relations (naming, conversation, skin-ship, date cost), how to react to the date violence. Women will be able to see it from beginning or just the parts they are interested in. If you are an I-phone user, you can load the program through iTunes App Store for free!

Activist education - What is ELF?

"I will force myself to make time to study."

"How much am I democratized? I had lots in my mind. Thoughts and practices must appear together, but I am still concerned about what to do. There are a lot of things that I don't know. I become happier whenever I come here.

"Every time there is a chance for education, I never miss them. After receiving the education, I considered them as charitable, and wanted to share what I learned, with others."

These are thoughts shared by participants who completed the activist education. "ELF" is the name of the educational program which is geared towards full-time activists who belong to the Korea Women's Hot Line throughout the country. It is short for "Empowerment, Leadership, and Feminism". Since 2006, it has prepared the education system and has conducted programs by each section; E, L, F. Section E is mainly about in-service training. Section L is about organizational management, vision and introspection. Finally, section F is about the value and identity of the Korea Women's Hot Line. It deals with what the Women's Rights movements and their directivity.

In 2010, we conducted the courses of in-serving training, understanding and practice of Women’s Rights movements and the education training for the new President, the Secretary General, the Chief of Affiliated Organization, new activists and the membership employees. At that time, having time to talk with mentors in each part of the in-serving training, participants could learn a great deal just by the mentors' sharing their experience and knowledge. Besides, the first 'comprehensive in-serving training' was tailored to the veteran activists. Also, it was an attempt to unify the new officials and members within the movement and the organization of the Korea Women's Hot Line. A number of people were satisfied. In survey based on the participants' education desire, many of them hoped that the activist education will deal with more practical contents and will include the value of feminism. Though these two things are not different matter, in-serving training, will be focused on the value, and others will focus on practice and real methodology.

The most important thing is being viewed as a 'human being'. We at the Korea Women's Hotline will put growth of the human being above anything else. Fine people, creates a fine society, and poor people creates a poor society. Increasingly, people who learn feministic values and behave according to those values in everyday life will enable society to become more feministic. ELF will help make that happen.

Activities of ELF in 2010

2010/3/4-5 new presidential in-serving training.

2010/3/11-12 new secretary generals' in-serving training.

2010/3/18-19 new the chief of affiliated organization in-serving training.

2010/3/25-26 new activists' in-serving training.

2010/4/22 new activists' in-serving training comprehensive education.

2010/6/23 membership employees' course.

2010/7/8 comprehensive in-serving training.

2010/10/21, 28, 11/11 understanding and practice of the women's rights movements.

2010/11/12 leadership coaching course.